February 19th - March 20th
Element - Water/Mutable
Tarot Card - The Moon
Crystals - Sodalite, Lapis Lazuli, Amethyst
Keywords - Shadow Self, Empathy, Patience, Dreams, Melancholy, Creativity
Strengths - Expansive boundaries, singular creativity and vision, and an infinite capacity for generosity and forgiveness, optimism
Weaknesses - Can be obtuse, sulky, and occasionally display doormat tendencies. Honestly, Pisces, you really need to make sure you have some hard asses in your corner who will tell you when enough is enough. Suffering is not required, and sometimes people do NOT deserve the benefit of the doubt, no matter how much you like to give it to them.
As a Scorpio, I really, really hate everyone, including myself. I also have an irrational hatred of handkerchief hemlines, the idea of tanning, summertime, liars, and the British. But man, do I love a Pisces. The wateriest of water signs always makes an appearance in my life when the need for gentle companionship and non-judgmental strangeness is not just longed for, but necessary. Need a friend to nap with 12 hours a day without feeling lazy? Call a Pisces. When no one else will listen raptly as you describe an epic recurring nightmare involving lampshades and sardines? Call a Pisces. Dying to produce expensive impressionist paintings wherein the sole subject matter is a dill pickle? For the love of the true gods, find yourself a friend in the most compassionate, least judgmental, and most gracious of all zodiac signs and hold Pisces auditions, stat. They are likely already painting those pickle portraits.
The following is a descriptive list of actual Piscean humans who I feel lucky to have known and who made my life better simply by being nice humans:
- Mark from my college drama program, who gave himself shock treatments to improve his social skills and who was a titled member of the Sarah Machlachlan Fan Club. I was broke and he always shared his lunch.
- Ted from high school, who once called the customer service number on a package of Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls, then cracked up the phone rep for 15 minutes trying to explain why they "failed the test of chocolaty taste." He is now a lawyer for the Indigenous tribes in Upper Michigan.
- Justin from Detroit, whose restored Monte Carlo helped us outrun a nimbus cloud from St. Ignus to Ann Arbor while we made up names for it like "Slappy Cloud Storms-a-lot" in the mania of sleep deprivation. Once home, we called each other on the phone every ten minutes to yell "SLAPPY CLOUD STORMS-A-LOT" and hang up. This went on for 6 hours.
- Jill from art class, who created extraordinary, swirly pastel portraits that made me painfully envious but whose true, crowd pleasing talent was her impression of her cat burying it's turd in the litter box.
You know how most of your acquaintances, when you describe a hardship to them, will say, "That's so awful," or, "I am SO sorry," and then go back to posting on Instagram or eating their chicken salad and you can tell they popped that response out like an animatronic fortune teller and they actually don't give two shits? Well, if a Pisces says that, they really mean it. They feel bad for you. They are worried. Pisces want you, and everyone, to be safe and happy. All they want in return is some reciprocity, a divining pool, a soothing soundtrack, and to sleep for 80% of their life. Bearing that in mind, Ritual has compiled some suggestions for Neptune appreciation month, so please...lets all show a Pisces that we love them. It's the least we can do.
This knit cardigan has no closure hardware and it's soft, poncho like construction is perfect for hiding, sleeping, and listening to music. What else is there?
The Moon Tarot Candle by Magic Fairy might be the perfect Pisces gift. Let's see...is it mystical? Check. Smells good? Check. Celebrates the dark psyche? Yep, looks like we have a winner. It's also a massage candle, so when Pisces needs a little pick me up they can anoint themselves with black pepper, orange, and patchouli essential oils, then proceed to speak in the tongue of The Oracle.
Pisces love jewels that are witchy, but not aggressively so. Soothingly witchy. Quartz amplifies, copper energizes and cleanses, and the whole shebang looks great over a flowy gown that doubles as pajamas.
Happy Birthday, you weird, lovely fishes.